She Never Cried In Front Of Me
by haleyrox
Summary: Jake reflects on his failed marriage with one miss Haley James. One-Shot


**Author's Note**: Yes. Your eyes do not deceive you. I am back. Temporarily **xD** So yeah…I decided to type something up so that this account could live up to its purpose. Hope you like even though I rushed some of it and it probably doesn't even make sense. I did this all at 3 a.m. …so I apologize for any suckiness or incoherentness (yeah I can totally make up words on thee spot) Anywhooo...I believe this started out well then it all just went to hell. But I tried.

**Disclaime**r: I own nothing, naturally.

Here goes nothing...

**She Never Cried In Front Of Me**

Haley James used to be Mrs. Jagielski.

Haley James was once my wife.

I used to be married to Haley James.

We were happy…err well seeing as we're now divorced, I guess I was wrong.

I was wrong with a lot of things when it came to Haley.

Like when it came to reading her emotions.

Which is why I never noticed that Haley was unhappy…

But now that I think back…I wonder how I managed to miss it…

_I closed the door as quietly as I could, so as not to disturb my sleeping wife. I crept through the living room to make my way past the kitchen but froze as the light suddenly turned on to reveal my very much _awake _wife. _

"_Uh…" I started, uncertainly. "Hey?"_

_Haley raised an eyebrow. "Hey?" she repeated. "Jake it's two a.m. and all you have to say is 'hey'?" _

_I sighed as I looked at her. "Babe, can't we talk about this tomorrow? It's late, and I can tell you're tired, let's just go to bed."_

_She gave me a look that I, then, identified as an 'okay I forgive you and agree that we should sleep' look. I suppose in actuality it was an 'I don't know how much more of this I can handle' look._

"_Fine," she said with a tired (read: agitated) sigh._

I really shouldn't have ignored her feelings like I did. If only I paid more attention, then I would have noticed all the fake smiles, the dry tears on her cheeks, and the sadness in her eyes.

Most importantly…

I would have known that she cried every time I left the room.

But I didn't know.

And I guess it doesn't even matter anymore.

She's married again.

Her mom sent me a video of the wedding.

Why? I don't know.

It's been sitting on top of my television ever since I received it. I never thought that I would ever watch it, but for some reason today…today felt like the right day to see it.

It was already set up and ready to be watched, all I had to do was press a simple button. But did I really want to do this? Did I really want to see my ex-wife marry some other guy? Why did I even keep the movie to begin with? Any sane guy would have thrown it away.

Why do I even care?

I should hate Haley for moving on.

Right?

Ugh…

I shook my head and let out a sigh as I lifted the control and pressed play.

I was met with her glowing face, looking beautiful in her dress as she waved at the camera with a cute smile. She was being pulled towards a park bench by her mother, who looked just as excited as her.

The setting changed entirely and I saw guy fixing his tie, looking nervous and excited.

Mostly excited.

So my guess is…that's the new husband.

I already hate him.

"_Sammyyyyyy," says the voice behind the camera._

"_What Dean?" Sam said, still trying to fix his uncooperative tie._

"_Whatcha doin there skipper?"_

"_Getting ready for my wedding."_

"_Never would've guessed that."_

_Sam rolled his eyes. "Do you have a point to this Dean?"_

"_I just wanted to ask, how does it feel?"_

"_How does what feel?"_

"_How does it feel to marry thee Haley James?" _

_Sam stared into the camera with a smile. "It feels perfect. I know that Haley and I are going to be happy together."_

I snorted, as I skipped this segment of the video. Yeah I thought that too, pal.

"_Do you, Haley James, take Samuel Winchester as your lawful wedded husband?"_

"_I do," she said with a bashful smile._

"_Do you, Samuel Winchester, take Haley James as your lawful wedded wife?"_

"_I do," he grinned._

"_You may kiss the bride."_

I looked away.

But when I looked back up, I think my heart broke.

She was crying.

Her happiness was so unbearable that tears of happiness literally flowed down her face.

That really makes me wonder.

She didn't cry at our wedding. She smiled a lot, sure. I mean I did too, and that was _with_ my uncertainty of it all. But …she didn't cry with joy.

Come to think of it, I don't think Haley has ever cried in front of me.

I _heard_ her cry on the phone…once.

It was either that, or she had the flu.

But still…that's different than _physically_ seeing the love of your life cry.

Which she made sure I never saw.

I do not know what to make of this.

Maybe if I had seen her cry during our marital problems then I would have realized how badly I was hurting her.

Maybe I would have changed.

Maybe we would have worked through our issues.

Maybe we would still be married.

But we're not.

And I have to move on…since obviously Haley has.

Although I can honestly say that I don't blame her.

As much as I hate to admit it.

I'm glad she's finally happy.

I just wish it was me who made her that way.

If only…

If only she had cried in front of me.


End file.
